I Wanna Start Working Out In The Morning So I'm Gonna Pay Riggs $5 For Every Morning I Don't Get Up

So as you’re probably aware I’ve been working out the last couple months. I started at the beginning of 2018. Lost 21 pounds in January. Lost another 13 pounds in February. Still working out in March. I’ve done it almost exclusively on the elliptical (I recently started lifting a little and buddy, I’m sore). Hence the #EllipticalGangGangGang you might’ve heard about on Twitter.com. I do all of my workouts after work. It’s going really well but I hate that I get home at like 8:30 every night. I get home and the day is over. I watch TV for a couple hours then go to sleep. So I got it in my head that, if I wake up early and work out in the morning, I can go straight home after work. I don’t plan on doing anything with my newfound free time. I just wanna have some. I’ll probably just watch more TV.

The only problem is I’m not a morning person. Like at all. I am a hibernating grizzly bear every morning. I would rather be water boarded than have to wake up early. My normal routine is waking up at the last possible second. I have it down to a science. I know exactly when I have to wake up so I won’t be late. It’s a skill, really. A skill I’ve been honing since elementary school. The idea of waking up before work and going to the gym has forever alluded me. But I want to do it.

So I took to the Twitter machine in hopes that my followers would give me the secret

Heres’s a list of some of the suggestions:

– Just get up you fucking pussy

– Put an alarm clock across the room

-Have a baby

– Get a puppy

– Don’t sleep

– Adderall

– Cocaine

– Don’t do it

All very good suggestions but I’m not ready to have a baby. Seems like a long term solution for a short term problem. My apartment is barely big enough to fit me so I can’t get a puppy. I need to sleep otherwise I’m a cranky betch. I’m not a huge drug guy so adderall and cocaine are off the table. I have tried putting an alarm clock across the room. That just ends with me walking across the room, turning the alarm off and going back to bed. This isn’t my first rodeo.

Then this tweet came across my mentions

I love that idea. I loved it right away. I need something to work against. Loud alarms, babies, cocaine and puppies aren’t gonna do anything for me. I need it to be, “If you don’t get up and work out then (blank) is going to happen.” That’s what I like about the payment idea. If I don’t get up and work out then I’m gonna lose money. That makes my brain tick. It works too. It’s 1 for 1. I went to the gym this morning and the main motivator was that I didn’t wanna pay $5.

Will it stay that way? Who knows. Riggs might make a shit ton of money off this. My goal is to make sure that doesn’t happen.

Also, I don’t know if people wanna do this with me but they’re welcome to. We could raise some money or something. Wake up for your workout in the morning or send $5 to my Venmo account and we can donate it. My venmo is Trent-Ryan-1 if you wanna get involved. We’re in this together.

#gang

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